Tele-Therapy services in california

Couples Therapy for Real Conversations and Lasting Change

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Couples Therapy

Couples therapy is here for you when you're feeling stuck in the same arguments, drifting apart emotionally or sexually, or facing big life changes together. Whether you're working through broken trust, navigating different intimacy needs, or simply wanting to feel closer again, this is a space where both of you can be heard and understood. As a couples intimacy therapist, I am here to help you rediscover your connection, heal after conflict, and build the relationship you both want, with compassion, clarity, and care every step of the way.

You may benefit from couples therapy if:

– You’re having recurring conflicts or communication breakdowns that feel hard to resolve

– You’re feeling emotionally or sexually disconnected from your partner

– You’re navigating a major transition, rupture, or shift in the structure of your relationship

$250 per session

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Couples Intensives

Couples intensives are a great fit for partners who want to dive deep into focused relationship work over a single day or weekend, especially when weekly sessions aren’t enough. They're ideal for couples facing a crisis, recovering from a rupture, or seeking meaningful breakthroughs in communication, trust, and intimacy..

You may benefit from Intensive therapy if:

– You’re facing a significant rupture or crisis that needs focused, immediate attention
– You’ve felt stuck in the same patterns despite ongoing therapy or personal work
– You want dedicated time and space to reconnect, repair, and create lasting change in your relationship

More Information on Intensives is on this page

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“Couples therapy with Dr. Scharfetter made a huge difference for us. We felt supported and understood from the start, and the sessions felt calm and productive instead of overwhelming. We learned how to communicate better and actually hear each other. We’re in a much better place now and really grateful for the experience.”
— RK

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

  • The Therapy Journey: Your Pace, Your Progress

    There's no one-size-fits-all answer to how long therapy lasts. Every individual and relationship is unique, so the duration of therapy varies depending on your specific needs and goals.

    What to Expect

    • Noticeable Progress: Many clients start seeing positive changes in their relationships and themselves within a few months.

    • Deeper Work Takes Time: For more complex issues or deeper exploration, therapy may require a longer commitment.

    • Safety, Empowerment, and Understanding: My priority is to create a safe and supportive environment where you feel empowered and understand the therapeutic process. Building trust and mutual respect takes time, and I never rush that process.

    • Commitment to the Work: The most successful clients are those who are actively engaged and willing to invest the time and effort needed for personal and relational growth.

    Your Unique Journey

    The length of your therapy journey is ultimately up to you. Together, we'll establish a pace that feels comfortable and productive, ensuring you have the time and space necessary for meaningful change.

  • I am currently not in-network with any insurance providers. However, I'm happy to provide you with a statement of services, also known as a "superbill," that you can submit to your insurance company for potential reimbursement.

    Important Considerations:

    • PPO vs. HMO Plans: PPO plans typically offer some coverage for out-of-network providers, while HMO plans generally do not.

    • Contact Your Insurance: It's crucial to contact your insurance company directly to understand your specific out-of-network benefits. Ask the following questions:

      • Are out-of-network mental health services covered under my plan?

      • If so, what percentage or amount of each session is covered?

      • Is there a deductible that needs to be met before coverage begins?

      • Is there a limit on the number of sessions that can be reimbursed per year?

      • Do I need pre-authorization for out-of-network services?

      • What specific information is required for reimbursement (e.g., diagnosis codes, provider information, etc.)?

    • Understanding Your Benefits

      By contacting your insurance company and clarifying your out-of-network benefits, you'll have a clearer understanding of the potential for reimbursement and any associated costs. This will help you make informed decisions about your therapy journey.

      If you have any further questions regarding insurance and fees, please feel free to reach out to me directly

    • Sexuality & Sexual Health / Functioning
      Exploring self-esteem in relation to sexual experiences and effectively communicating personal needs within your relationships is essential for fostering deeper connections.

    • Male Sexuality and Intimacy Issues can often create barriers to emotional closeness and sexual satisfaction, making it crucial to address these challenges openly.

    • Additionally, navigating Mixed-Orientation Marriages presents unique dynamics that require careful consideration and understanding.

    • Finally, it is important to discuss Issues related to desire and libido, as these aspects can significantly impact both individual well-being and relationship satisfaction.

    • Polyamory, ethical non-monogamy (ENM), non-monogamous arrangements, and open relationship dynamics present unique challenges and opportunities for individuals and couples.

    • Additionally, navigating the complexities of kink, BDSM practices, and serving as an LGBTQAI ally are all significant aspects of contemporary relationships that are welcome to explore in our work together.

    • In this space, we also address the nuances of sexual narcissism and the intricate sexual power dynamics that can arise in various interactions.

    • Furthermore, I provide assistance in integrating past experiences with psychedelics and other peak life moments that individuals may struggle to process on their own, fostering deeper self-understanding and emotional healing.

  • Absolutely. It's common for one partner to be experiencing a particular challenge, but couples therapy offers a space to explore how both partners are impacted. We work collaboratively to create understanding and compassion on both sides, so that healing can happen relationally, not through blame or pressure, but through connection and shared growth.

  • No. My role isn’t to make that decision for you, but to help you gain clarity, insight, and emotional honesty so that you can make informed choices about your relationship. Whether you’re looking to repair, redefine, or part ways consciously, therapy offers a supportive space to move forward with care and intention.

  • Desire discrepancy is one of the most common reasons couples seek sex therapy. It doesn’t mean something is “wrong,” it means there’s something important to explore. Together, we’ll unpack what’s happening beneath the surface, understand each partner’s experiences and needs, and build tools for communication, flexibility, and connection that honor both of you.

  • Sex therapy is a specialized form of talk therapy that focuses on concerns related to sexual functioning, desire, identity, and intimacy. But it’s not just about sex, it’s about connection, self-worth, communication, and healing. Whether you're experiencing low libido, shame, performance anxiety, or simply want to better understand your erotic self, sex therapy provides a safe and nonjudgmental space to explore those experiences with curiosity and compassion.

  • Yes. I am an inclusive, affirming space for individuals and couples of all identities, orientations, and relationship structures. Whether you're curious about non-monogamy, actively practicing polyamory, or navigating an open relationship, you'll find affirming, knowledgeable support here. I understand that non-monogamous relationships come with their own set of joys and challenges, complex communication needs, boundary negotiations, scheduling logistics, jealousy, compersion, and creating agreements that honor everyone's needs. This is a judgment-free space where your relationship structure is respected and understood.

  • Couples intensives are ideal when you want to dive deeper than what weekly sessions allow—whether you're in crisis, recovering from betrayal, or simply want to reconnect more intentionally. Intensives offer a focused, immersive container for meaningful breakthroughs and lasting change. If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just ready for transformation, an intensive may be the reset you need.

TAKE THE first step toward HEALING

Schedule a Consultation