What People Are Usually Really Asking for in Couples Therapy

Most couples don't show up to therapy wanting to "fix" each other.

They come because they want to feel understood again. Safe again. Chosen again.

Beneath all the fighting, there's usually a quieter question lurking: Do you still see me? Do I matter to you? Can we even talk without everything blowing up?

Couples therapy isn't about pointing fingers or memorizing the "right" things to say. It's about slowing things down enough to see what's really going on underneath. When people actually feel heard and their walls come down a bit, things start to shift on their own. Conversations get softer. You find your way back to each other. Trust starts rebuilding, one small moment at a time.

And honestly? You don't have to be in crisis mode to come in. Plenty of couples just want to feel closer, communicate better, or get on the same page about things that matter.

That's not a red flag, it's actually a sign that your relationship is important to you.